I made Cherry Squares today
The legendary recipe
I only ate one (to test, it of course)
Enough calorific value
To power a generator
Or keep me awake.
When we were kids
We could honk as many squares
As we could get away with
Avoiding my mom’s wooden spoon
Flailing at us like some
Doomed to failure.
I thought maybe the smell
Might bring her back
Or maybe the taste
Or the pride in seeing them disappear
Down the gullets of her loved ones.
Make this broken house a home again.
My mum is gone now, almost two years
And that’s just her body.
She started leaving several years before that.
Her Cherry Squares (the legendary ones)
Aren’t the same
Without her around.
Now I can eat as many as I want,
And I only had one. I only wanted one
A lot less fun. A lot less magic.
A wee bit tragic. No strategy to beat
The sentry. No sentry, free entry
There they sit in the fridge
Waiting to be coveted
Waiting to be fought over
Waiting to be honked
Nobody here to honk them
It said “guard with your life”
On the recipe
Maybe that’s why i can’t sleep.
My family is all apart now.
We come together for
Weddings and funerals
And talk on the phone
Less and less often.
“If you bake Cherry Squares, maybe they will come”
Pan of dreams.
Written in 2013 when things were darker.
Made them again today for my brother and sister